so for once i am NOT HUNGOVER whilst writing this. im actually ridiculously relaxed and calm because im trying to be a serene person and i just had the aussie conditioner in my hair for about half an hour so it's sort of like im pamering myself. so im not hungover. im just drinking milk and eating muesli.
anyway, this post will be a bit different to the normal ones. basically theres no need to break this one down into scenes, as all the action takes place on the wall in this episode. im just going to kinda ramble on with random thoughts and whatnot, cannot be bothered to make it particularly coherent or w/e.
Game of Thrones Season 4 Episode Nine:
The Watchers on the Wall
It was pretty obvious that this episode was going to be a big episode, simply because of the pattern that each series of game of thrones has followed so far. The 'BIG EVENT' always happens in episode 9. In season 1, it was Ned Stark getting beheaded (still not OK with that). In season 2, it was the Battle of Blackwater. In season 3, the Red Wedding. OK this season has had a couple more 'big events' throughout (with more to come, nudge nudge) but the producers are sticking true to form and having this season's episode 9 as a stand-out episode in the series by having all the attention focused on one particular event. It's only the second time they've ever done it, the first being 'Blackwater' in season 2. always a bit of a risky decision to completely ignore all the other characters (especially as we're all dying to know whats happening in the aftermath of oberyn's death) but i think it works. not quite as well as 'blackwater' (which is still my favourite episode ever, ships wildfire boom) but a good attempt nonetheless.
ok so the wildlings are coming. We have two groups of wilding at the moment. One the north side of the wall, the massive wildling army of around 10,000 (or is it 100,000?) and on the south side a smaller host consisting of Ygritte (Jon's luvahhh), Tormund (epic beard) and the slightly sexy Thenns (cannibals). Apparently Tormund had sex with a bear. Interesting. They are both going to attack at the same time. Oh, by the way, I am really, really upset that the word 'minge' made it into game of thrones. not ok. the writers are american, i didnt even know they used that word in america. 'minge' is not a game of thrones word. never use 'minge' again.
Maester Aemon (old blind dude) = basically a bit of a player in his youth. he says something like 'don't you know what i could have been'. err game of thrones does this sometimes, refers to something mentioned aaaaages ago that people have probably forgot but THATS WHY IM HERE. he is basically referring to the fact that he could have been king. He is a Targaryen and was in line for the throne, but he declined it. Everything would have been different if he had said yes and become king. There would have been no 'Mad King' Aerys (Daenerys' dad), the Targaryen dynasty would still be in power and the land would probably be at peace. Aemon would have made a cool king. I love Maester Aemon. I am super curious though.. who was the woman Aemon was in love with? What if they had a baby? WHAT IF THERE IS ANOTHER ILLEGITIMATE TARGARYEN FLOATING AROUND, DESCENDED FROM SOMEONE IN THE LINE OF SUCCESSION BEFORE DAENERYS'S FATHER? WHO?! WHOOOOO?!!!!
I hate Gilly. I cant even call her Gilly. she is Cassie from Skins. Sam's trying to be all noble and brave and manly and she's whining for him to stay with her. Her storyline bores me to hell. But NO-ONE IN GAME OF THRONES SHOULD EVER UTTER A PROMISE THAT THEY WON'T DIE BECAUSE LOOK WHAT HAPPENED TO OBERYN. "today is not the day i die" wambam watermelonheadsmash. anyone who likes sam tarly must've had a suddenly clenching of the sphincter the moment he promised cassie from skins that he wouldnt die.
MAMMOTHS!!
wait did grenn tell a little fib to get rid of janos slynt? slynt who doesnt believe in giants, even when theres a giant riding up to the wall on the back of a bloody mammoth. clever janos slynt. well janos slynt is a douche. he's the guy that tyrion had sent to the wall in season 1 (maybe 2, actually). he was the guy responsible for killing all those children, including the baby in the brothel, because they were king roberts illegitimate children. so we don't like janos slynt. janos slynt is a douche.
 |
| not impressed. |
so now jon is in charge hooray.
anyone else think the thenns face after he gets a hammer to the head is absolutely hilarious? looks like grumpy cat.
OK SPOILERS HERE
ygritte wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. i love ygritte. she is basically bianca from eastenders without her silver puffer jacket and a gaggle of ginger kids. she gets shot with an arrow by the kid from a couple of episodes ago. the one who the thenn said 'im gonna eat your dead mama and your dead papa' to. i think ygritte killed his mum and dad, so he's got his vengeance now. but super sad.
for ages all ygritte has talked about is killing jon snow, its been the driving force behind her participation with the attack. she wants to kill him for betraying her and, though she never says it, for breaking her heart. but when the moment comes, she doesn't do it. jon smiles, accepting death at her hands, and you see the flicker in her face; she hesitates, and we never know whether or not she would have actually done it.
and so we lose more comrades. george r.r. martin is basically that special kid that crushes beetles that tyrion was talking about in the last episode, except instead of beetles it's characters that martin is crushing along with our hopes and dreams. sigh. what with all these characters dying, wouldn't it be lovely if someone came back from the dead.
